THE CHAPTERS OF PINKU

I

“Hi,” said Bishesh.

“Hi,” said Pinku.

“Did you like the programme?”

“Not really.”

Pinku shifted her weight from one foot to the other, her gaze lingering on the worn concrete floor of the venue. She felt an uncomfortable awkwardness settle over her, and Bishesh could read it in her tense shoulders. He observed her closely for a moment before stepping into her line of sight with an easy confidence.

“Hi, I’m Bishesh. I’ve just completed my Bachelor’s degree in Journalism. I love reading, so I end up visiting book fairs whenever there’s one in town.”

Pinku offered a polite, faint smile, murmured a quick node, and walked away. She had never been comfortable conversing with strangers, and something about his immediate persistence felt overwhelming.

The next afternoon, their paths crossed again at the sprawling grounds of Bhrikuti Mandap during the book fair. A small crowd had gathered to hear author Prajwal Parajuli speak. As the talk proceeded, Bishesh occasionally stole glances at her. Every so often, Pinku found herself looking back, caught between curiosity and discomfort.

For Bishesh, the connection felt instantaneous—a sudden, overwhelming love at first sight. For Pinku, however, the sensation was entirely different. His intense gaze made her uneasy, and his presence felt intrusive. As soon as the event ended, she hurried toward the parking lot, but Bishesh rushed to intercept her.

“Hello! Hey, wait!” he called out.

She was just about to pull her helmet over her head when she turned around. He reached her side, slightly out of breath. “Hey, hi.”

“Hi,” she replied, offering a tight, forced smile. Even though he had introduced himself the previous day, nothing about his aggressive charm impressed her.

“Hey, can we get a cup of coffee together?”

Pinku blinked in surprise. No guy had ever asked her out on a coffee date so directly. “No, I have somewhere I need to be. I’m sorry. Besides, I really don't feel comfortable going out with strangers.”

Bishesh offered a smooth smile. “Strangers become friends. Friends become good friends, and good friends become...” He paused, letting the phrase hang in the air with a knowing look.

Pinku gave him a baffled, deeply uncomfortable glare. Sensing her coldness, Bishesh’s posture faltered, a wave of sudden nervousness washing over him. Pinku wondered why this complete stranger was pursuing her with such relentless confidence.

“Can’t we just be friends?” he tried again, softening his tone. “I really feel like we share similar choices.”

“Bye,” she said firmly, putting on her helmet and riding away.

Bishesh stood watching her leave, a sharp sting of guilt and disappointment settling in his chest. He couldn't explain what had drawn him to her so intensely, but he was convinced he had fallen for her.

Later that evening, Pinku found herself unexpectedly haunted by the interaction. She sat by her window, unable to concentrate. Why was he so insistent on being her friend? She considered herself plain, quiet, and ordinary. He seemed articulate, confident, and handsome enough to attract anyone—so why her?

“Oh, God. Why am I even thinking about him?” she muttered to herself, shaking her head. “No, this is absurd.”

Seeking an escape from her thoughts, she pulled out a copy of Sidney Sheldon’s Nothing Lasts Forever and tried to lose herself in its pages.

A month passed before they met again at another book exhibition. Pinku froze when she saw him walking through the stalls. A part of her felt shocked by the sheer coincidence, while another part felt a strange spike of adrenaline. Bishesh’s face lit up instantly. He walked straight up to her. Seeing him approach, Pinku made a move to turn around and walk away, but her steps hesitated.

“Do you believe in destiny?” Bishesh asked, stopping beside her.

Pinku looked at him, amused despite herself, and let out a soft laugh. She didn't answer, brushing past him to continue browsing through the stalls. Yet, Bishesh followed a short distance behind, holding onto the hope that he could change her mind.

“Can we please just get one cup of coffee?” he asked.

Pinku stopped and turned around. “Why are you so persistent? Why are you chasing after me?”

“Because I love you. I fell in love with you the very first moment I saw you.”

She looked at him incredulously. “What? How is that even possible? Love at first sight only exists in movies and novels, Bishesh. Not in real life.”

“It happened to me in real life,” he said softly, his eyes fixed on hers.

“So?” she countered defensively.

Bishesh didn't answer. He simply stood there, looking at her with a quiet, earnest intensity.

Pinku let out a long sigh, her defenses finally breaking down under his calm persistence. “Fine. I’ll have a cup of coffee with you. But on one condition: after this, you don't follow me around anymore.”

Bishesh’s face brightened into a genuine smile, and he nodded eagerly.

They walked to a quiet cafe nearby and sat across from each other. As the steam rose from their table, Bishesh leaned back. “So, you’re a law student.”

“Yes. I’m studying criminal law at Kathmandu School of Law,” she replied.

“That explains why you’re always analyzing me so carefully.”

A genuine smile broke across Pinku’s face. Bishesh caught his breath, captivated by the sudden warmth in her expression.

“You have one of the most beautiful smiles I’ve ever seen,” Bishesh said softly. “It looks like the kind of smile that has fought through problems, crushed fears, and hidden pain. Most people might not notice the struggles you carry, but your smile hides them effortlessly. I think that’s what I fell in love with.”

Pinku blushed slightly, deflecting the moment with a dry laugh. “Please, don’t flirt like that. Did you read those lines off the internet?”

The waiter served their coffee, and the initial tension dissolved into an easy, comfortable conversation. Pinku watched him over the rim of her cup, noticing his quiet manners and soft voice. He actually seems like a very nice guy, she thought, surprised by how quickly her initial suspicion was fading.

When they finished their cups, Bishesh looked down at the empty mug with a exaggeratedly sad expression, wishing the moment wouldn't end. Pinku caught his puppy-dog look and laughed. Touched by his sincerity, she pulled out a piece of paper, wrote down her phone number, and slid it across the table.

Bishesh looked at the paper, his face lighting up with genuine, unsuppressed excitement. It was the happiest he had felt in a long time.

Following that afternoon, their occasional meetings grew into frequent dates, and within months, both had fallen deeply in love. Yet, their dynamic was distinctly different from typical couples.

While both enjoyed literature, Pinku’s world revolved almost entirely around books. She was introverted, reserved, and happiest when left alone with a novel, largely indifferent to parties or social gatherings. Bishesh, on the other hand, was restless and adventurous—he loved traveling, exploring new places, and soaking in the world around him. He wanted to spend every available hour with Pinku, but her preference was always quiet stillness.

One weekend, Bishesh managed to convince her to travel to Nagarkot. They sat at the top of the view tower as the sun began its slow descent over the hills, casting golden light across the landscape. Bishesh attempted to talk to her, describing the horizon, but Pinku was completely absorbed in a paperback, turning page after page.

After twenty minutes of being ignored, Bishesh’s patience wore thin.

“Pinku, can you please put the book away for once?” he snapped, frustration creeping into his voice. “When I’m out here with you, at least try to be present. Enjoy the view, enjoy life! You can be so incredibly boring sometimes.”

Pinku didn't look up. “Shut up and let me finish this chapter. I’m almost at the end.”

Losing his temper, Bishesh reached over and pulled the book from her hands. Pinku’s head snapped up, her eyes flashing with anger. “Give that back to me right now.”

Bishesh stared at her, his voice cold. “One of these days, I’m going to walk away from you because of this boring, obsessive habit.”

Pinku snatched the book back from his grip, her jaw set. “Then leave. Who’s stopping you?”

She returned to her reading without another word, leaving Bishesh to stare silently at the sunset alone.

II

For three full weeks, Pinku called Bishesh repeatedly, but every attempt went straight to voicemail. He left her text messages unread and vanished without explanation. She even traveled to his house once, only to be told by neighbors that he wasn't around.

Anxiety and frustration built inside her until she couldn't stay in her room any longer. Needing a change of scenery, she went down to Himalayan Java Coffee in Thamel.

She was sitting near the corner with her mug when the door opened. Bishesh walked in—and he wasn't alone. Beside him was a stylish, attractive girl. Pinku’s heart dropped. She watched in disbelief as Bishesh laughed at something the girl said, leaning in close with a familiar, easy intimacy.

A wave of anger and betrayal washed over Pinku. She stood up, walked directly over to their table, and stood over them.

Bishesh’s laugh instantly froze. His face went pale, his eyes wide with shock. “Pinku... Hi.”

Pinku kept her expression completely unreadable, hiding the tremor in her hands. “Mind if I sit here?” she asked calmly, pulling out a chair before he could answer.

Bishesh looked frantically between Pinku and the girl, panic evident in his posture.

The girl frowned, sensing the sudden tension. “Who is she, Bishesh?”

“I’m his girlfriend,” Pinku said plainly.

“What?” The girl stood up instantly, her chair scraping loudly against the floor. “Bishesh, what is she talking about?”

“Please, sit down, Riya. Please,” Bishesh pleaded nervously, glancing around the cafe to make sure they weren't creating a scene. He gestured frantically for both of them to stay calm. Reluctantly, Riya sat back down. The three of them sat in a heavy, suffocating silence.

“Are you going to explain what’s going on here?” Riya demanded, her voice tight.

Bishesh swallowed hard, unable to meet Pinku’s eyes. “Riya... this is Pinku.”

“And?” Riya pressed.

Bishesh took a deep breath, staring down at his hands as he spoke. “When you and I broke up a few months ago... I was completely wrecked. I wanted to prove to myself that I didn't need you, that I could move on and find someone else. That’s when I met Pinku at the book exhibition. I followed her, and I pretended to fall in love with her... but I didn't.”

He looked up at Riya, his voice pleading. “Being with Pinku only made me realize how much I actually needed you back. She was boring to me. She was quiet, plain, and obsessed with books in a way I couldn't stand. I pretended to share her interests just to fill the silence. I missed you every single day, Riya. I realized my mistake, came back to you, and we patched things up.”

He finally turned to face Pinku, his voice devoid of warmth. “I’m really sorry, Pinku. I don't love you. I never did. I love Riya.”

Tears welled in Pinku’s eyes and began to spill down her cheeks, but she didn't wipe them away.

“You used me,” she said, her voice trembling with quiet anguish. “You used me just to mend your own broken heart. I genuinely loved you. I trusted you. Did you ever stop to think about what this would do to me? I might be quiet, plain, or boring to you, Bishesh, but my feelings were real. I had a clean heart. Did you never see that?”

She shook her head, wiping a tear away with the back of her hand. “No one can forgive you for this—not even God. To get what you wanted, you destroyed me. If you had just been honest about your past, I would have stepped aside. I would have helped you.”

Without waiting for a response, Pinku stood up and walked out of the cafe, her vision blurred by tears. Bishesh made a motion to step forward, but his feet remained glued to the floor. Guilt pressed heavy on his chest as he watched her leave, wishing desperately that he had handled his cowardice differently.

III

Eight months later...

Eight months had passed since that afternoon in Thamel. For eight months, Pinku had cut herself off from the world. She deactivated her social media accounts, turned off her mobile phone, and retreated entirely into her rented room in Koteshwor.

The betrayal had hollowed her out. She had forgotten how to smile, seeing no purpose in her daily routine. She had given Bishesh an unconditional, raw kind of love—a love she had never offered anyone else—and its sudden destruction left her feeling ruined.

Sitting on the edge of her bed, watching the afternoon sunlight fade against the wall, tears quietly filled her eyes as the old memories resurfaced. She felt a profound anger at herself for being naive enough to believe him.

Suddenly, a loud ring broke the silence of the room.

Pinku froze. She had finally switched her phone back on an hour ago, and the screen was now flashing with the name of her best friend: Shreya.

She picked up the phone and pressed it to her ear, remaining completely silent.

“Hello? Pinku? Is that really you?” Shreya’s voice came through the speaker, frantic and loud.

Pinku listened, her throat too tight to produce a sound.

“Hello?! Why aren't you saying anything? Speak to me, Pinku!” Shreya shouted, her frustration rising.

Overwhelmed, Pinku hung up the phone. It was the first time in their years of friendship that she had ever disconnected a call on Shreya.

Thirty minutes later, the loud ringing of her doorbell echoed through the small flat.

Pinku opened the door. Shreya stood on the threshold, breathless and furious. She pushed past Pinku into the living space, taking in the dim, messy apartment and Pinku’s pale, exhausted frame.

“What are you doing to yourself?!” Shreya demanded, her eyes wide with concern and anger. “Why haven't you been responding to anyone? Look at you! Why can't you accept that he left? He dumped you for someone else, Pinku! You deserve so much better, but instead, you’ve spent eight months hiding in this room, destroying your own health! You’re pushing away everyone who cares about you!”

Pinku sank onto the sofa, pulled her knees to her chest, and began to sob uncontrollably.

Shreya’s tone softened instantly. She walked over, sat beside her, and pulled her into a firm embrace. “Please stop crying, Pinku. You’re draining the life out of yourself. Staying locked up in this apartment only forces you to relive the pain over and over. You need to step outside. You need to start living again.”

“How am I supposed to forget him, Shreya?” Pinku wept into her friend’s shoulder. “I loved him more than I loved myself. When he walked away, it felt like everything inside me died. I wanted to end it, but I couldn't even do that. I’m so angry, so bitter... How do I fix this?”

“We take it one step at a time,” Shreya whispered, holding her tight. “Together.”

IV

“Good morning, Bipin sir,” Pinku said quietly as she walked into the office corridor.

“Good morning, Pinku,” he replied with a warm smile.

Pinku walked into her workspace at the Human Rights Office in Ekantakuna. It had been two months since Shreya had finally convinced her to apply for the position, pushing her back into active life.

Slowly, the routine had begun to heal her. Surrounded by friendly, open-minded colleagues, Pinku found herself opening up again. She wasn't the same girl she had been before, but the heavy gloom had slowly begun to lift.

On March 16, 2014, the office director, Anil Shrestha, stepped into the main hall. “Everyone, please gather in the conference hall for five minutes.”

Once the staff assembled around the central table, Anil spoke up. “Today, we have two new team members joining us. I’ll let them introduce themselves.”

A young woman stood up first. “Namaste, I’m Anu Sharma. I recently completed my Master’s degree in Journalism, and I’ll be joining the Gender Empowerment and Social Inclusion Department.”

Next, a young man seated near the head of the table leaned forward with a warm, confident smile. “Hello, Namaste everyone. My name is Safall Shrestha. I recently arrived from the US on a break, and I wanted to spend my holiday volunteering here in Nepal. I’ll be working with the Refugee Department.”

Pinku looked at him. He carried an effortless warmth that seemed to fill the room. When it was her turn to speak, she stood up and clearly outlined the current operations, upcoming projects, and partner organizations of the Refugee Department. As she spoke, she noticed Safall listening intently, his eyes fixed on her with genuine interest.

V

Later that week, Pinku found herself scrolling through Safall’s Facebook profile in her quiet office chamber. He was undeniably attractive, but it was his candid, warm smile in his photos that caught her attention. A gentle feeling—something she hadn't felt in a long time—stirred in her chest.

She was so absorbed in looking at his pictures that she didn't notice Shreya walk into the room.

“Aha!” Shreya shouted right in her ear.

Pinku jumped, her heart racing as she slammed her laptop screen shut. “Shreya! You scared me!”

Shreya grinned wickedly. “You’re looking at Safall’s photos! You like him!”

“Don't be ridiculous,” Pinku said, her cheeks turning bright red. “I was just browsing.”

“‘Just browsing,’ right,” Shreya teased, rolling her eyes with a smile. “I’m leaving before you combust.”

As soon as Shreya left, the door opened again, and Safall walked in carrying a stack of project files. “Hey, Pinku, do you have a few minutes to go over these field reports?”

“Sure,” she said, quickly clearing her desk.

As Safall sat down and began explaining the details of the project, Pinku found herself barely listening to the words. She was watching his hands, the way his expression shifted when he spoke, and the quiet kindness in his voice. Sensing her gaze, Safall suddenly looked up. Pinku instantly dropped her eyes back to her laptop, pretending to type furiously. Safall smiled softly to himself, noticing her blush.

By 5:10 PM, the workday was over. Pinku packed her bag and headed for the main exit. As she stepped into the courtyard, she bumped into Safall.

“Which way are you headed?” he asked.

“Koteshwor.”

“No way, I’m staying in Koteshwor too! Mind if we head back together?”

Pinku hesitated for a second before nodding. “Sure.”

Just as they reached the outer gates, the clouds broke, and a heavy downpour began to rain down over the city. Neither of them carried an umbrella. They stood under the small awning of the gate, watching the water cascade off the roof.

Safall turned to her with a playful glint in his eye. “Have you ever actually felt the rainfall?”

Pinku looked at him, confused. “What do you mean?”

“I mean dancing in the rain... while eating ice cream.”

Pinku laughed softly. “No, definitely not.”

“Come on. Try it with me once.”

He pulled her by the hand toward the Big Mart across the street. A minute later, they stepped out onto the pavement carrying two ice cream cones, stepping directly into the pouring rain.

The cold rain soaked through their clothes, but as Pinku took a bite of the ice cream, a feeling of pure, unburdened freedom washed over her. She looked at Safall, who was watching her with a warm, gentle gaze. Their eyes locked, holding the moment in a quiet understanding that needed no words.

A sharp crack of thunder echoed overhead, breaking the spell. They broke into laughter, hailed a passing taxi, and climbed inside, dripping wet.

That night, back in her apartment, Pinku stood by her open window, watching the rain fall against the glass. For the first time in years, she felt truly light. Across town, Safall was looking out his own window, thinking of her smile. Unable to contain her joy, Pinku stepped out onto her small balcony and let the rain wash over her, laughing and dancing in the cool night air.

VI

The following morning, Pinku arrived at the office, rushing into her chamber to prepare for the day. Sitting in the center of her desk was a small card alongside a neatly folded letter.

She opened the card first—it featured a simple illustration of a red rose with a short quote about quiet joy. Then, she unfolded the letter.

Dear Pinku,

There are so many things I’ve wanted to tell you since the day we met. You carry a quiet, beautiful grace—an X-factor that I noticed the moment you first spoke in that meeting room. But more than anything, you have the most incredible smile. It brightens everything around you.

I want you to know that you are deeply appreciated, even if life has made you feel invisible in the past. Even when you think no one notices you, I always will.

You have quickly become the most important part of my days. I want to care for you, respect you, and bring genuine happiness into your life every single day. I love you, Pinku—even more than I did when we stood together in the rain.

Thank you for being who you are.

With all my love,

Safall Shrestha

A radiant smile broke across Pinku’s face. Sitting at her desk, she realized something profound: what she had felt for Bishesh wasn't love—it had been a desperate need for acceptance. With Safall, there was no pretense, no pressure to be anyone other than herself.

The door creaked open, and Shreya walked in. Seeing the look on Pinku’s face, she stopped in her tracks. “Okay, why are you glowing? What happened?”

Without a word, Pinku handed her the letter. Shreya read through it quickly, her eyes widening. “Oh my god! Pinku! What are you going to say? Is it a yes?”

Pinku looked at her friend, her eyes shining. “Yes.”

Shreya squealed and pulled her into a tight hug.

Half an hour later, while Safall was away from his desk, Pinku walked into his chamber and left a small, folded note on his notebook. When Safall returned and opened it, a simple response met his eyes: Yes.

Over the next few weeks, they were inseparable. They explored quiet cafes, walked through the city, and spoke openly about their hopes for the future.

With only three days left before Safall’s planned return to the US on June 20, 2014, he invited her to the Roadhouse Café in Bouddha.

As they sat near the courtyard, Safall noticed her subdued mood. “Why the sad face, Pinku?”

Pinku looked down at her hands. “Because you’re leaving. I wish you didn't have to go back to the States. Can’t you stay here in Nepal?”

Safall reached across the table and took her hands in his. “Hey, don't be sad. I’ll be back during my next vacation. And when I return...” He smiled warmly, looking directly into her eyes. “Will you marry me?”

Pinku’s breath caught in her throat. She looked at him, tears of joy filling her eyes, and nodded eagerly. “Yes. Yes, I will.”

He leaned in and pulled her into a quiet embrace, sealing the promise.

VII

At the Tribhuvan International Airport departure terminal, Pinku stood close to Safall, holding him tightly as if letting go meant losing the moment forever.

“It’s time for me to go,” Safall whispered, gently wiping a stray tear from her cheek. “Please give me that beautiful smile before I walk through those doors. I’ll be back in a few months, and then we begin our life together.”

He kissed her forehead gently, gave her hand one final squeeze, and walked toward the security gates. Pinku watched him go, waving until he disappeared into the crowd.

As she turned to leave the airport terminal, she froze.

Standing near the exit doors was Bishesh.

He looked unrecognizable. He had lost significant weight, his hair was unkempt, and an untrimmed beard covered his pale face. His posture was slouched, bearing the distinct look of someone who had neglected himself for months.

He noticed her and took a hesitation step forward. “Hi, Pinku.”

Pinku kept her face impassive and tried to walk past him, but Bishesh stepped into her path. “Please... just give me five minutes. I really need to talk to you.”

Reluctantly, wanting to avoid a scene, Pinku agreed to sit at a small café just outside the airport gates. She sat straight, looking past him, her calm posture a stark contrast to his nervous fidgeting.

“How have you been?” Bishesh began softly.

“Good.”

“How are your studies?”

“Fine.”

“And your job?”

“It’s fine.”

Bishesh fell silent for a moment, stung by her cold efficiency. He took a deep breath. “Pinku... I know I hurt you deeply. I know you have every right to hate me. But after I got back together with Riya... it was a nightmare. She constantly mistrusted me, argued over every minor detail, and accused me of lying. I realized how toxic it was, and we broke up for good.”

He leaned forward, his voice desperate. “After being left completely alone, I realized your true value. I remembered how mature you were, how you handled problems without drama, how genuine you were. I was foolish to call you boring or unattractive. I was blind, Pinku. I truly love you now. Please, come back to me. Give me one more chance, and I promise I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”

Pinku listened silently. Then, a small, calm smile appeared on her lips.

“So you finally experienced what it feels like to have your heart broken,” she said quietly. “To be used and discarded.”

Bishesh lowered his head, unable to meet her clear gaze.

“To tell you the truth, Bishesh,” Pinku continued, her voice steady and free of anger, “I need to thank you. If you hadn't walked away from me that day, I never would have learned what real love actually feels like.”

Bishesh looked up, confusion and dread creeping into his eyes. “What do you mean?”

“I’m in love,” she said simply. “With a man who respects me, who loves me for exactly who I am. We are getting married in a few months. If you hadn't broken my heart, I would have stayed trapped in a dynamic where I was never truly appreciated. You didn't ruin my life, Bishesh—you freed it.”

Bishesh sat frozen, tears silently streaming down his face. He had no words left to say. His own cowardice and arrogance had led him straight to this empty, quiet table.

Pinku stood up, adjusted her bag over her shoulder, and walked away into the bright afternoon sunlight, leaving Bishesh alone with the consequences of his choices.