STANDING ON THE EDGE OF A GROUP: THE STRUGGLE TO BELONG

There’s an awkwardness in standing just outside a close group. You hesitate to step into a circle that already exists. This in-between space shows the quiet struggles of belonging and acceptance that shape our social lives.

In many gatherings, whether among family, friends, or colleagues, circles form naturally. They consist of shared histories, inside jokes, and mutual understanding. These circles offer comfort and identity to those within, but they can feel like invisible barriers to those on the outside. The person at the edge often senses this. They are caught between wanting to join and fearing rejection.

This hesitation is universal yet deeply personal. In Nepali social contexts, where community ties and group harmony matter greatly, the pressure to fit in can be immense. However, stepping forward risks awkward silences, misread cues, or even subtle exclusion. The circle often has a set rhythm, and newcomers must learn its beat without disrupting it.

The struggle involves not just physical closeness but also emotional space. It requires earning trust and proving you belong. Sometimes invitations are clear; other times, they are implied, leaving the outsider to interpret often vague signals. This can be exhausting, especially for those who are shy, come from different backgrounds, or are simply new.

But standing at the edge offers opportunity. Just being there shows courage—the desire to connect despite uncertainty. Sometimes a simple smile, a shared glance, or an unexpected word can break down the invisible barrier. The circle can then widen, slowly including new voices and viewpoints.

Recognizing this struggle encourages us to be more welcoming. We should notice those on the sidelines and offer genuine invitations. Belonging is not just about being inside the circle—it’s about the willingness to make room, lean in, and reach out.