HOW TO FOLD A SARI (AND UNFOLD A MEMORY): A NEPALI INSTRUCTIONAL GUIDE

 

The sari, or saree, is more than six yards of fabric; it is a tapestry of moments. When we fold it, we are not merely creasing silk or cotton; we are carefully putting away the stories woven into its threads. This act of folding, a practical skill passed down through generations of Nepali women, becomes a meditation on identity, family, and the spaces we inhabit.

Step 1: Laying the Groundwork (The Hem and the Mother's Lap)

Instruction: Lay the entire length of the sari flat on a clean surface, such as a large bed or the floor of a cleared room. Hold the fabric at both ends of the bottom border (kinar) and smooth out any deep wrinkles.

The Memory: As your hands follow the edge of the hem, remember the countless times your aama (mother) or hajuraama (grandmother) would sit on the floor, doing this very task. This is the Foundation of Belonging. The hem is what grounds the fabric, just as their stories and steady presence grounded you. The gentle friction of the fabric against the floor evokes the sensation of sitting in your mother’s lap, feeling safe while the world spun around you. The border you smooth out is often weighted or embroidered, a sign of its importance—it holds the whole garment together, just as the women in your family hold the lineage.

Step 2: The First Fold – Lengthwise (The Sisterhood of the Sari)

Instruction: Bring one selvage edge of the sari to meet the other, folding the garment perfectly in half lengthwise. You will now have a piece approximately three feet wide. Ensure the heavy border lines up precisely.

The Memory: This is the Fold of Alignment. Think of the young women you grew up with—your sisters, cousins, and friends—who have all stood beside you, adjusting their own sari pleats for a wedding, a puja, or a Teej festival. When these two edges meet, they represent the unity of womanhood in your life. They stand parallel, supporting one another, just as you and your peers navigated the transition from childhood to young adulthood, sharing whispered secrets and passing down the knowledge of how to drape a difficult silk or how to secure a petticoat knot.

Step 3: Folding the Pallu (The Pride of the Ancestors)

Instruction: The pallu (the decorative end that drapes over the shoulder) is usually the most ornate section. Carefully lift the folded fabric from the pallu end. Begin making a series of accordion or fan-like pleats (approximately 12 inches wide) until the entire pallu section is neatly stacked.

The Memory: This careful pleating of the pallu is the Tribute of Appearance. This is the part of the sari that is seen, the canvas where the family's finest weaving or embroidery is displayed. It is the section that symbolizes your role in the public sphere—the poise, the grace, and the quiet strength expected of you. As you stack the pleats, remember the weight of the pallu on your shoulder during your first formal family gathering. That weight was not a burden; it was the comforting presence of your lineage, the quiet pride of all the women who have worn a similar pallu before you, carrying the family's honor and beauty into the world.

Step 4: Stacking the Body of the Sari (The Rhythm of Domestic Life)

Instruction: Once the pallu is pleated and folded back onto itself, the remaining length of the sari (the body) needs to be folded. Use the width of the folded pallu as your guide, folding the rest of the long, narrow strip into even, manageable squares (often three or four folds across the length).

The Memory: This repetitive, rhythmic action is the Pace of Womanhood. The squares represent the ordered compartments of domestic life: the kitchen, the prayer room, the terrace, the garden. Each fold is a day, a week, a season. The smooth, even folds reflect the tireless, often invisible labor that creates the comfort and stability of a Nepali home. As you stack them, recall the scent of spices and incense from your childhood kitchen, the rhythmic sound of a washing stone, or the quiet murmur of a morning puja. These stacks are the quiet, persistent rhythm of life, created and sustained by the hands of women.

Step 5: The Final Tuck (The Secure Identity)

Instruction: Take the neatly folded stack and gently wrap the pleated pallu section around the entire bundle, tucking the edge securely under the body of the fold, or placing it in the accompanying storage bag.

The Memory: The final tuck is the Seal of Self. The fabric is now compact, protected, and ready to be put away. This finality is a moment of reflection on the fluidity of your own identity. The sari, when draped, is a celebration of your heritage; when folded, it is an acknowledgment of your personal space and self-possession. You have taken a vast, flowing garment and contained it, asserting order over chaos. You have put away the woman who wore it for a moment, knowing she will emerge again, refreshed and re-draped, the next time the occasion calls. The memory is not gone; it is simply tucked away, secured until the day the fabric is unfolded, and the story begins again.