LOVE WITH THE NEIGHBOUR

I

Saturday

8:00 am

Sunrise City

I got up at 8:00 am. It’s the last day for me. After getting up, I had the habitual of opening curtain and looking outside through the window. After a few minutes, I went inside the bathroom and after freshness; I made a black tea for myself and was at my balcony. I started reading the newspaper. After completing reading newspaper, I looked here and there. Meanwhile, I saw one young guy looking at me. Furthermore, he smiled at me. I gave him a fake smile. I felt awkward when he was looking at me so, I went inside my room.

After completing my household, I was in the balcony with my cup of tea. It was evening time. Children were playing at the ground and I was enjoying looking at them. While looking at them, I felt emotional because my child died before he was born. My eyes were full of tears and I was lost in my own world. I came in reality when football came in my balcony.  When I came into reality, I saw the same guy and he was smiling at me.

Why is he smiling at me? Either have I known him or he knows me. He doesn’t know me but why is he smiling at me? I felt like he is following me. I again felt awkward so, I didn’t bother about me and went inside in my own room.

The next day was Sunday. I had a holiday on this day too. I was working in NGO so, I had two days holiday. On this day too, I got up late. After a few hours, I came in the balcony with newspaper and tea. While reading the newspaper, my eyes got stuck on the next flat. There, I saw the same guy and he smiled looking at me. He waved at me but I ignored him.

This continued for many days and there were many inquiries on my mind. Why that guy is looking and smiling at me? Who is that guy? Why does he wave at me? Why only me? What is the purpose?

After a week, I was at the vegetable shop. Meanwhile, I saw the same guy and I was trying to escape from him but he came near to me and said, “Hello.”

I ignored him and walked away from him. He followed me and was calling me but I didn’t speak to him. Then, he stood in front of me and smiled and said, “Hello. I called you but you didn’t listen.”

“Why should I listen to you? I don’t know you. We are strangers. Why are you following me?” I said with anger.

“I find you beautiful that is why I am following you.”

“From onward, please stop following me. I do not like this at all.”

“I believe that one day you will like me.”

I didn’t prefer to speak with him so, I rushed to my flat. This continued for many days. I was amazed why was he following me. He seemed younger than me. I was neither young nor beautiful. Still, he was after me. He would get a beautiful and better girl rather than me.

II

After a week………

I was at the meat shop. After buying half a kilo of meat, I saw the same guy standing in front of me. He smiled when he saw me. I ignored him. Although I left the shop and he followed me. He was saying ‘Hello.’ I was ignoring him but still he was following me. I reached to my flat and he too was at my flat.

“Why are you following me? What do you want?” I said angrily.

“I fell in love with you and I want to marry you.”

“What? What are you saying? Why me? I am older than you. You will get a better girl. You don’t know anything about me nor I know anything about you.”

“Love doesn’t see age, gender, and religion. Love is love. Eyes see the person and the person enters in the heart. Love is the connection between the heart and the person. When I first saw you, my heart has captured you. I only know that I Love You. I don’t care about your age, what you do and I don’t care about your past. I want to give you all the happiness. Moreover, I want you to be lost in my love and forget your past and live in my love world.”

“We don’t each other and how can I fall in love with you?”

“If you cannot fall in love with me, you can be friend with me.”

“Sure,” I said quickly. I was amazed at why I said yes so quickly. Did I fall in love with him? My brain said no but my heart said yes.

Our friendship started and he frequently visited my flat. I started knowing about him. His name was Birat Dhakal and he works at car showroom at Naxal. He was a sales manager. After falling in love with Birat,  I knew that love doesn’t see the age gap. Love fills the gap. With his love, I started forgetting my past experience of love.

III

After finishing lunch, we were in the living room. After a few minutes, Birat said, “Anu.”

“Yes.” I was focus on the newspaper.

“Actually, I want to ask you one question. I am confused about whether to ask you or not.”

“What kind of question?”

“Question is related to your past.”

I kept the newspaper on the table and said, “Ask.”

“Actually, you are a nice person. Still, you are single.”

I remained silent. I knew that I should share my past with Birat and today was the right time. Whereas Birat was observing me and breaking the silence, he said, “I am sorry. My intention was not to hurt you. If you don’t want to share, that’s fine.

“No, it’s not like that. I have to share you about my past.”

He was observing him and I started sharing my past.

“I was living with my parents. My younger brother is living with his wife and daughter in Australia. I  never preferred to stay abroad. I was seeking a job after completion of my Master’s Degree in Sociology. I was applying for a job in the I/NGOs and luckily after two years, I got the job in one of the leading NGOs. While I was working at NGO, I met my childhood friend. After a long period of time, we were meeting. He was working in the same office as a Communication Officer.

We started meeting frequently after the office. We started spending quality with each other. I didn’t know how he felt about me but I fell in love with him. I was happy whenever he was with me and I wanted to spend my entire life with him.

It was August 4, 2016, and it was my birthday. I was working till 5:30 pm. After a few minutes, I switched off my computer and was ready to leave the office. Meanwhile, my eyes got on the flower and chocolate. Not only flower and chocolate, but there was also a small note which was of Abhishek. I sat on the chair and started reading the note.

Happy Birthday to the beautiful girl that I have ever met. On your birthday, I want to grab an opportunity. That opportunity is to propose to you. I love you, Anu. I want to make you mine, only mine. I hope I shall get a positive answer.

Once again, Happy Birthday.

                                                                                          Your love

I was exhilarated to read the note. It was the biggest gift of my birthday until now. There was no chance of saying no to his love. The next day, I said yes. After accepting his love, we officially started dating.

After the two months of courtship, we got married. We were happily married till two years and our life changed. After two years, I was pregnant. We both were happy. More than me, Abhishek was happy. But our happiness didn’t last long. I had a miscarriage. After the miscarriage, we had an argument and he was not able to understand me. We wouldn’t stand each other and finally, we separated.

I didn’t prefer staying with parents as I felt I wouldn’t provide them happiness. So, I started living alone in this flat. After Abhishek left, I didn’t prefer to fall in love. I stop believing in love. But when you came in my life, I started believing in love and I am happy. You made my life colourful.”

Birat was listening and observing me. Meanwhile, I was lost in my world. He, then said, “Whatever had happened, that was not accepted but you should make your life beautiful. I will be with you every time.”

I smiled and we both hugged each other. Birat had made me comfortable and he was the person who gave brought happiness in my life but I didn’t know that my happiness would last for a few days only.

IV

It had been more than a week; we hadn’t met and seen each other. I felt heavy from my heart. There were questions in my mind. I felt like he had betrayed me and I was furious. With lots of questions on my mind, I reached his flat. I was amazed and surprised to see the flat-locked. Then, I gave a call to him but the mobile was switched off. Where should I search for him? What’s happening in my life?

The next day, again, I reached Birat’s flat. I inquired with his neighbour’s but nobody knew about him. I was trying to reach but he wasn’t receiving my calls. Finally, I reached his workplace and I was able to know that he had changed his number and his work station was shifted in Pokhara.

Why didn’t he communicate with me? My eyes were filled with tears. I got the address of his workplace and reached Pokhara with the madness. Like Birat, I too wanted to give him a surprise. I followed him every day. I followed till one week. In the beginning, I didn’t doubt him but after one week, what I saw and heard was not accepted by me.

After two days, I reached to Birwat’s flat of Pokhara. The door was locked from inside. I heard the voice of Birat and one lady voice. I was able to listen to only half of their conversation. But whatever I heard made me feel heavy. I was able to know that he used me only. Moreover, he pretended to be with me and his love was fake.

The next day, I reached Kathmandu with a heavy heart. I didn’t prefer to meet him and listen to him.

V

I was lost in my own world. Moreover, I wasn’t able to concentrate on my work. I was changed. My colleagues were worried and asked me about my changed behaviour but I pretended that I was alright. I wouldn’t share my problem with me. It was within me.

Although I wanted to ask Birat about his betrayal, something stopped me. On the one hand, I felt it might be false but on the other hand, I felt it might be true. I was in a dilemma.

In conclusion, I got my answer after two days. I was reading two national Nepali newspapers. I was shocked to read the news. Birat became a writer and I didn’t know about it. Some parts of the novel were published in the newspaper and I started reading the part. While reading the published part, it was about him and me. I felt heavy.

Furthermore, I started reading another newspaper where his interview was published in which he had mentioned that, “While doing the research, I found out that love doesn’t see the age. Love fills the age gap. Moreover, I was able to know that when you are in the age, you want more love and you accept the people to love you more than anything else. Furthermore, it was difficult to convince the character. More than that, the female character didn’t know what I was doing research for my story. But she will surely know about it and the reaction will be embarrassed.”

The newspaper also mentioned that he was supposed to get married after two months. After reading the newspaper, I wanted to die. I wouldn’t handle myself. Moreover, I tried a lot to commit suicide but I failed. So, I decided to go far away from the madding crowd where nobody could recognize me. Although I was far away from Kathmandu, I wasn’t able to escape from the past. I wasn’t able to forget Birat. His memories made me a mad person. Most of the time, I was recalling his name. I was totally mad. Neither I got his love nor was I able to forget. The more days were passing, the more I was mad and were lost in his memories. Nobody was there to help me to get out of his memories. I was the failure in the love.