CONVERSATIONS I HAD IN MY HEAD WHILE SMILING IN REAL LIFE
The holiday party was a gaudy, cramped trap. My supervisor, whose laugh was a rusty gate, had me trapped against the food table. He was talking about synergy and deliverables, but I heard only the chaotic hum of my own thoughts. "Great quarter, Mark. You hit it out of the park," he said, whacking at my back with a bit too much enthusiasm. Is he sarcastic? That isn't praise. I blew through half of the quarter watching cat videos. Did he even see me? Does he have a record of my browser history? Oh God, he knows. I smiled, a wide practiced smile. "Thanks, sir. The team really gelled." The team? They're a bunch of glorified coffee gluggers. I'm the one who stayed late, living on stale vending machine coffee and the grim resolve not to screw it up. And a team doesn't 'pull together.' They get 'dragged' together, screaming and kicking most of the time. One of my colleagues approached, Sharon, the woman who was always scented wit...
